Prise de la Bastille (Bastille Day)
September 14th has been the most significant national holiday in France since the establishment of modern French government. It has a unique nickname, La fete de la Federation, which means ‘Festival of civil armed forces’. As this title shows, French Revolution, the origin of the holiday, broke out in September 14th, 1789 by the riot of enraged Parisians who had long been exploited by the privileged class of French society, composed of royalty, nobility and cleric. It took more than 5 years for this magnificent revolution to be concluded by the emergence of Napoleon, highly-recognized French soldier. Although the 5 year process of brisk change had not been constant and spotless, French Revolution is considered as the most influential and momentous incident in whole human history. It has first erected the concept of human right, equality and freedom, which are regarded as a matter of course in our time.
Since Bastille Day(September 14th) acquires special meaning to French people, festivals and ceremonies on the day are held on large scale. The fact that Eiffel Tower, the well-known French landmark, was built to commemorate 100th anniversary of Bastille Day, shows how much French value the day. On a daytime, visitors can enjoy magnificent military parade with crowd jamming the streets of Paris. French Air Force participates in this parade by flying over the capital city. It is custom that French President shows up in the midst of the parade and celebrates this meaningful day with his nations.
When Paris gets dark, the parade proceeds steadily toward the climax. Spectacular fireworks are displayed on the night sky of Paris, which drives people’s excitement to the zenith. The whole city is filled neatly with crowd who are eager to have opportunity to appreciate this annual masterpiece in better spot.
Describing the history and festivals of Bastille Day induces me to plan a trip to Paris again. Since I was a child and with my family in my first trip to France, I couldn’t share joys and happiness of Parisians on the holiday. If I get chance to visit the place again, I would like to enjoy the wonderful moment in Paris, where dynamic history of civil revolution is alive and well.
I was astonished by your such large background information! I liked how you explained in your first paragraph on the origine of the festival, because I'm not very familiar with Bastille Day. Your main point seems to be "The history and the parade of Bastille Day".
ReplyDeleteOne thing I couldn't understand was the word "zenith." Surely you already have researched before you use it, but it's just that I haven't seen this word before.
And for me your conclusion part didn't seem like a conclusion, because you coucluded your writing with your personal thoughts about your trip to France. If you conclude with sentences which are more relevant with your topic, I think that will make the biggest improvement in your writing. Anyways I enjoyed your writing!! Good job!
What a great writing! Seems like you have strong language skills! Good ;)
ReplyDelete1. You thesis statement isn't quite clear and i don't see it in the introduction paragraph
2. Your background information is very full and specific.
3. Each paragraph does present different ideas but i'm not sure if they are different parts of process.
4. Second and third body paragraph seem to be organized in a logical sequence.
5. You've got lot of acts, definitions and details that are just sufficient.
6. In the conclusion, i could find some good comments but it would been better if you said it as if you are recommending to others not for yourself?!
Very well done! i enjoyed reading your writing! I've learned alot :)
First, your hook sentence was interesting. Actually, because your title was hard to understand, but because of this trait, some readers can feel interests in your essay. also your back ground information was sufficient and your body paragraphs followed a logical sequence. Also you have many facts and definition with specific explanation on them.
ReplyDeleteSeptember 14th, 1789. Angry citizens of Paris were bunched together in plaza and they soon headed to Bastille prison, where political offenders against Louis XVI had been in confinement. At once, the king’s loyal prison was burned by a mob of furious crowd and the royal army dashed to suppress the riot was brutally slaughtered by the citizens. The city was immediately occupied by enraged Parisians, who were believed to be lowest class of the society and obliged to serve the privileged minority. The heat of revolution spread rapidly to the whole city. No one could stop this fever. This French fever was slowly but, surely being propagated to entire countries of the 18th century Europe.
ReplyDeleteSeptember 14th has been the most significant national holiday in France since the establishment of modern French government. It has a unique nickname, La fete de la Federation, which means ‘Festival of civil armed forces’. As this title shows, French Revolution, the origin of the holiday, broke out in September 14th, 1789 by the riot of enraged Parisians who had long been exploited by the privileged class of French society, composed of royalty, nobility and cleric. It took more than 5 years for this magnificent revolution to be concluded by the emergence of Napoleon, highly-recognized French soldier. Although the 5 year process of brisk change had not been constant and spotless, French Revolution is considered as the most influential and momentous incident in whole human history. It has first erected the concept of human right, equality and freedom, which are regarded as a matter of course in our time.
Since Bastille Day(September 14th) acquires special meaning to French people, festivals and ceremonies on the day are held on large scale. The fact that Eiffel Tower, the well-known French landmark, was built to commemorate 100th anniversary of Bastille Day, shows how much French value the day. On a daytime, visitors can enjoy magnificent military parade with crowd jamming the streets of Paris. French Air Force participates in this parade by flying over the capital city. It is custom that French President shows up in the midst of the parade and celebrates this meaningful day with his nations.
When Paris gets dark, the parade proceeds steadily toward the climax. Spectacular fireworks are displayed on the night sky of Paris, which drives people’s excitement to the apex. The whole city is filled neatly with crowd who are eager to have opportunity to appreciate this annual masterpiece in better spot.
It is said that Bastille day has very strong magnetizing effects on people from all around the countries. This is not only because it offers abundant variety of attractions, but also has great historical basis, which deeply impress the whole of the humanity regardless of their gender, age, nation and race. French Revolution, which was a great step forward for all of mankind, remains in our heart in the name of Bastille day.